What’s your "A Day in the Life" like?

and what to do when you don't feel like scrolling social media

Lately, I’ve become totally obsessed with people’s “A Day in the Life” Youtube videos, substacks (I love

Kate Eskuri, DNP

’s Day in the Life from over a year ago!), and blog posts like

Grace Atwood

’s. I am endlessly curious about how others spend their time and structure their days. Maybe I am hoping for some brilliant time hack they have found or perhaps I am just hoping my own routine is enough. My curiosity about this topic has led me to become more mindful of how I spend my own time and what routines and rhythms I have created that support me in my endless quest to be grounded, connected, and happy. 

Most weekday mornings I do the same thing. I get up, splash water on my face, brush my teeth, put on workout clothes, grab a coffee, and read several pages of a few different books. Then I finally pull myself out of my chair for a quick 30-minute workout before the busy day begins. This morning routine ensures I hit a few anti-burnout basics: quiet time, reading, and moving my body. My mind and body notice when I get to work and have skipped the routine or failed to have a few moments of quiet time; it’s part of what keeps me grounded and sets me up for a good day so I can be responsive instead of reactive.

My current book stack of morning reading: Voluntary Simplicity, Come As You Are, Devotions, and The Daily Stoic along with my other morning staples of water and coffee.

Research shows that if we incorporate routines into our day, they can have a positive impact on our mental health. This article files routines into two different categories: primary routines and secondary routines. Primary refers to routines that ensure our basic needs are met such as hygiene, sleep, and eating. “Secondary routines reflect individual circumstances, motivations and preferences, and include exercising, leisure/social activities, and practices associated with work or study, including keeping oneself on time and meeting goals and targets.”

Maybe now is a good time to ask yourself how you are doing with your primary routine - are you getting enough quality sleep? Are you eating in a way that nourishes you? Once you have your primary routine written down, move on to the things that fit into the secondary routine category.

Do you have a list of what things keep you grounded and connected and feeling like yourself? Here is what I have discovered is best for me to tend to on a monthly, weekly, and daily basis:

1. On the first of each month, I check out my birthday calendar book and see who has a birthday coming up. Add a note to my grocery list to pick up a card. 

2. Get my previous month’s business finances in order so I am always prepared for tax season. My future self will appreciate present me for doing this boring task (I set a reminder for this task monthly since it is not a habit yet).

3. Meal prep on Sundays for weekday lunches

4. Move my body each day in some way (I do shorter workouts during the week and longer runs Friday-Sunday when I have more time)

5. Set Reminders for things not in my normal routine (like making a certain appointment, writing a check for a sports thing, school meeting, etc).

6. Quiet time by myself each morning

7. Intentional and thoughtful exchanges in group texts with local friends/best friends who live far away

8. Eye contact and kiss with husband before walking out the door for work

9. Hug, eye contact, and kind words with each kid before they head out to school 

10. Drink several Nalgene’s worth of water 

11. Dinner with my family at the dinner table with intentional conversations about their day, gratitude, and silly things

12. Outside time if weather/schedule allows

13. Pick up around the house before we start our wind-down routine

14. Read before bed with kids

15. Apply lip mask and hand and cuticle lotion before I turn off the light

16. Deep breaths as I fall asleep 

These things don’t happen every single day and when I find that I have missed one or several or maybe even all of them, it is really really important that I offer myself compassion. I am not striving for perfection here. See image below for how life actually looks.

I am pretty sure this is a screen grab that Lesley Stephens at Morning Person posted a while back. It pretty much sums up how routines look in real life.

Also, nothing in this list is really groundbreaking, right? But I have found these things to be KEY to maintaining my mental health and capacity for life. When I complete a handful of these tasks, I am implicitly telling myself I matter. (Also, I have purposefully created a list things to do instead of making a whole list of things not to do.)

And while we are creating and engaging in more nourishing routines, how can we make our time more intentional and stop the scroll?

I keep a running list of things I’d rather be doing than scrolling through social media! It’s something I often work on with clients during sessions, especially when they’re struggling with doom scrolling. We all deal with it at times, so having a go-to list really helps.

Sure, I can tell myself to stop scrolling, but I’m way more likely to dive into something enjoyable if I have a reminder handy. I keep my list on my phone, but I often suggest clients stick it on their fridge or bathroom mirror—somewhere they'll see it often!

Photo by Nik on Unsplash

Below is the list I created for myself; I recently divided the list into low energy and high energy. This ensures that I have options based on what kind of mood I am in.

High Energy

• Play my piano

• Clean something

• Organize the junk drawer

• Water the plants

• Quick Peloton Workout

• Write a Substack piece

• Play with kids outside

• Cook something 

Low Energy

• Read a book

• Delete old photos/videos on my phone

• Text a friend or family

• Gentle Yoga movement

• Play Barbie dress up with my daughter

• Watch my son play a video game

• Stretch

• Meal Plan on Pinterest

• Go for a walk

• Journal

• Use tools from this substack if I am feeling the blahs

There are more things I would like to add to my secondary routine like journaling, a writing practice, and doing a weekly State of the Union check-in with my husband. However, there is only so much time. I know I am doing my best each day to engage with what feels right and I am hopeful that at some point the magic portal of time will open up and I will able to do it all…just kidding. That won’t happen, but striving for this is a good intention to have. This routine is not set in stone, so I always have the option of switching things up when I need a little more of this or a little more of that.

Are you also curious about how people spend their days? I would love to know how you structure your self-care routines and ensure that you are managing your time in a way that you feel proud of. I love the old saying - if I don’t manage my time then my time will manage me (or maybe that’s about money…regardless it applies here.)

**Disclaimer: The stuff you find on this website or in our online yoga and therapy antics is meant for laughs and general info only. It's not a stand-in for serious medical or therapeutic wisdom. Before you embark on any new yoga moves or delve into our therapeutic shenanigans, consult your healthcare pal. Participation is your choice, and we won't be held responsible for any sudden interpretive dance injuries.

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